It's a busy time in advisory!

Many things are going on in our advisory program right now, so I wanted to take some time to share them with you!

Recently we wrapped up our 3rd quarter contests - with Culp and Enns advisory partners coming out on top!  They were treated to a pizza lunch yesterday here at school.  Hennessy/Wilson took 2nd place and Guthrie/Mohr nabbed the 3rd place spot - those advisory groups had ice cream sandwiches delivered to them to celebrate!  In order to be successful in the contests, advisory groups must cooperate, work together, and be enthusiastic.  4th quarter contests will begin after Spring Break.

One of our final contests for 3rd quarter was a Random Acts of Kindness challenge.  Advisories were asked to spend a week completing as many Random Acts of Kindness as they could.  Each act of kindness was represented using paper chains outside advisory classroom doors.  Wilson advisory earned the top spot for this challenge with over 100 acts!  Enns and Hoffman advisories also had some pretty long and impressive paper chains!

More recently, students were given the opportunity to take a pledge to stop using the "R-word."  The r-word is the word "retarded."  In the fall during our Awareness Week we dedicated a day to the Down Syndrome Guild of Kansas City and students across the school were touched by their Just Like You film regarding life with Down Syndrome (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5M--xOyGUX4).  Nationally each March organizations like the Down Syndrome Guild KC participate in "Spread the Word to End the Word," a campaign educating people about the harmful impact of using the word "retarded" in a derogatory way.  This campaign was discussed in advisory and students could sign the online pledge to not use the "R-word."  You can read more about this campaign here: http://www.r-word.org/.

Most recently our students are beginning to think about a school-wide community service project for next year.  Each advisory has selected a current 6th or 7th grade student to represent them on the planning team.  The planning team is hard at work brainstorming ideas and sharing them with their advisories.  Advisory groups are then providing feedback that the representatives bring back to the planning team.  Stay tuned to find out what our school-wide project for next year will be!

And finally, I am starting many of my days with the 5th grade for the next several weeks.  During this time I am quickly interviewing the 5th graders.  I ask about their favorite/least favorite things about school, what extra-curricular activities they like to do, etc.  This information will be used to help match the students with their middle school advisor.  So far I've been working with Mr. Davis' homeroom.  It's so energizing to talk with the 5th graders!  I can't wait to have them with us next year!  We'll announce their advisory matches to them in late May!

Coming up after Spring Break:  All school LEGO drive for The Giving Brick (http://www.thegivingbrick.org/index.html).  *Please consider donating your LEGOs!  Also, 8th graders will share their Professional Day presentations with their advisory groups.

Wellness 2.0 and preparations for the 2016-2017 school year

As you have likely heard at this point, the schedule is adjusting slightly next year in the middle school with addition of elective courses for our 7th and 8th grade students.  Additionally, you may be aware that our Wellness curriculum will be moved into this elective time frame for the 7th and 8th graders.  You might be wondering exactly what this will mean for your child, so I wanted to share with you some details that will be helpful to understand.

Each 7th and 8th grade student will be enrolled for Wellness one of the 4 quarters during the school year.  The Wellness classes will be mixed grade, with both 7th and 8th grade students in the same quarter.  However, we will be able to divide by grade level as we will only be all together one day each week.  The other 4 days the larger group will be divided into two groups - based on gender and/or grade level (depending on topic).  Each smaller group will spend 2 of those days in the commons continuing Wellness curriculum conversations and the other 2 days will be with Coach O'Toole for additional physical education instruction.  Our Wellness curriculum will be able to take a more in depth look at our 3 focus areas:  Physical Health (brain development, healthy eating, sexual development, etc.), Social Health (friendships, conflict resolution, peer pressure, bullying, social injustice, etc.) and Mental Health (stress, self-esteem, suicide prevention, understanding mental illness, etc.).  The students will have more time to think critically about these topics and apply the concepts to their own experiences.  I'm excited about the possibilities for the program!

I will still meet with the 6th grade students for Wellness out of their PE time as has been done previously.  The curriculum for 6th grade is similar to the topics of the 7th and 8th grade, but with greater emphasis given to friendships, bullying and conflict.

Also to begin preparing for next year, our faculty has begun transition meetings and conversations.  I have meetings scheduled with Lower School teachers and Upper School student support staff to best understand the needs of the students as they move to new buildings on campus.  We discuss academic needs, social needs, advisor qualities, etc.  Similarly tomorrow morning teachers will be meeting by academic department (grades 6-12) to dedicate time to their ongoing conversations regarding curriculum across the Ward Parkway campus.

On Friday during our Professional Development Day we also had many great collaboration opportunities as a Ward Parkway Campus.  I participated in conversations about risk taking and perfectionism, technology in the classroom, and suicide in high stress academic settings.  Each time I am able to talk with my colleagues regarding these important topics I am struck by the incredible thoughtfulness that is put into the lessons taught, the care for students and their well-being, and the desire to be a strong team of educators together.  I can assure you that our teachers are developing ways to make their classroom a place where students feel comfortable and welcome.  Also, they are working to ensure that the technology used in the classroom enhances the learning and engagement.  And finally, that our students know how to seek help when they feel overwhelmed and they hear the message from us, "We're here for you, we care about you and we like you for who you are, the way you are."

What's happening in Advisory?

Wednesday morning during late start, our middle school advisors gathered to talk with each other about the goals of our advisory program, sharing ideas for our advisory groups and general planning/problem solving.  As a spin off to this conversation, I decided to ask our 8th graders to think about their specific advisories and how they can help support their advisor by bringing positive leadership to their groups.  I was certainly pleased with the conversations that occurred and the thoughtfulness our 8th grade students showed.  I wanted to share a few of their thoughts with you:

Recently our advisories worked together to raise money for the American Cancer Society through a change drive.  We raised over $500!  

Cori Culp's advisory completed every activity on the suggested activities list for Advisory in January and they are on a mission to win our 3rd quarter contest challenge.  So far they are in the lead!

Robert Wilson's advisory held a bake sale and raised money for a local animal rescue group!

Debra Anderson's advisory spent some time in January working together to complete a puzzle, and they did it :)

And finally, Andi Wolfe's advisory worked long and hard at learning to knit and then knitting scarves that were donated to a local shelter!

Coming up soon in advisory we will have a Random Acts of Kindness challenge in which the advisories will be competing to see how many random acts of kindness they can complete over 4 days.  

One of the best things about being a school counselor is the ever-changing daily activities.  This month has been no exception!  I've visited the 5th grade, talked to the 7th grade about stress and how art can help with an art therapist and introduced 8th graders to a career development tool to help them begin preparing for Professional Day.

5th grade visit
Earlier in January I had the pleasure of introducing myself and my role to the 5th grade group!  I brought over my "school counselor tool kit" to talk with the students about my job and how I can be of help to them as they move to the middle school.  We discussed how my room is a safe space to talk through worries, conflict, life changes and challenges.  I shared with students that I will also be talking with them in classroom situations about friendships, stress, and how your brain works among other topics.  From there we talked about how they are a team about to start a new journey together.  Students listed ways that a team operates to be successful together and things that get in the way of a group's success.  We made a poster that hangs in Mrs. Rose's classroom reminding the Class of 2023 how they can help each other as they transition to middle school.

After that Dr. Leonard introduced herself and gave the students time to ask whatever questions they wanted to regarding the middle school.  "How will we know where to go?"  "When do we get our locker?"  "What is advisory like?"  This was just the first of many opportunities for the 5th grade to ask questions and begin to get acquainted with life on the Ward Parkway campus!  I'll be back in February with a panel of 6th grade students who will share their experiences with the move from 5th to 6th grade.

For follow up at home:Ask your 5th grader what they know about the middle school.  What makes them nervous?  Try your best to just listen for awhile and then make your response about validating their perspective.  For example: "I bet a lot of 5th graders are nervous about that too."  or "Everybody feels nervous when there is a change in their life."

7th grade stress and art therapy
Thanks to a wonderful grant from our Arts Council, we were able to bring in Michelle Hamilton, an art therapist at Truman Medical Behavioral Health to lead our 7th grade in a stress reducing art activity.  The lesson began with a discussion about what stress is, our body's physical reaction to stress and insight into new research showing the positive impact of participating in artistic activities on reducing stress.  

After this introduction, Michelle gave each student a fine point sharpie and blank tree outline on a piece of paper.  Students also received a pattern idea sheet.  Michelle explained that our brains like patterns, they seek them out and when found, our brain interprets a sense of safety, thus reducing stress.  As such, drawing patterns, an art activity called "zentangles," is helpful for stress management.  Michelle walked students through how to draw various patterns and the students got to work!  Each student was able to take their sharpie marker with them for future zentangle drawings.  Since that time, many students have commented how much they enjoyed the lesson and that they are continuing to use the strategy.  In fact, as I write this today I am supervising a 7th grade study hall in which many students are working on zentangles!

For follow up at home: If your child enjoyed the zentangles idea, Google search for "zentangle templates" or look up "zentangles for beginners" on YouTube and try some out together at home.  Sharpies work best for this, but are not required.  You might also get your hands on some adult coloring books, which are often zentangle patterns to color in.

Many thanks to Michelle Hamilton and our Arts Council!

8th grade Professional Day preparations
Each year in January Mr. Guthrie so kindly invites me into his 8th grade math classes to spend the day introducing students to Missouri Connections (www.missouriconnections.org).  Through this website students are able to begin to get introductory information about various careers and how their individual interests relate to the world of work.  To do this students respond "Like" or "Dislike" to a series of listed activities, which in turn provides them with a list of careers that involve those activities that they expressed as "liked" activities.

A large part of this discussion is about the limitations of the program.  While it is helpful, it does not know everything about the person taking the inventory.  I am clear with students that their results should not be interpreted as being told what job they should do as an adult.  Rather, this activity is meant to get them thinking about what kind of professional they might like to shadow on Professional Day, which takes place in early March.

As always, the students do a wonderful job being reflective on their results and asking great questions that get Mr. Guthrie and I thinking!  It's a fun day to dream about the future with the students!

For follow up at home: Ask your 8th grader to show you their profile on the website and ask them what they thought of their results.

Finally I wanted to let you know about an upcoming blood drive in Haley Bernard's honor.  Haley is a local child who was diagnosed with a rare form of childhood leukemia.  Last year our middle school worked together with the Make-A-Wish foundation to sponsor's Haley's wish trip to swim with the dolphins.  Below is the link to the flyer I received from Haley's mother with the information regarding the event.
Haley Blood Drive

The Tools to Manage Middle School Stress

I'm sure I don't have to tell you that ERB testing and final exams are next week!  There's no doubt that this time of year can feel quite stressful for middle school students.  However, there is also no shortage of supports available for students to manage and cope with rising stress levels.

All 7th and 8th grade students met in grade level groups for Advisory on Monday November 30.  In these groups, students discussed study plans, strategies and tips that will lead them to success with their exams at the end of this semester.  Mrs. Tuncten has been meeting with students seeking additional study support as well.  Teachers held office hours this morning and are talking their students through successful preparation in their classes.

Additionally, students are meeting with me during Wellness to discuss what stress is and what to do about it.  6th grade students learned about our bodies Flight or Fight response, how it is triggered in times of stress and it's physical impact on our bodies.  Here's a great video the students watched that explains this important survival mechanism: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hnpQrMqDoqE.  From there we talked about how to respond to your bodies stress signals in a way that will lessen the Fight or Flight response.  Student each made their own personal stress plan using the Skitch app.  Here are some of my favorite examples:

Our 7th graders will have their lesson when we return after winter break.  This is delayed in part because of the scheduling and set up involved in this very special lesson.  The 7th grade students will be working with an art therapist from Truman Behavioral Health who will teach them about journaling and art as stress management strategies.  I'm very excited for this new opportunity with our students and quite thankful to the Arts Council for funding this project through a grant!

8th graders met with me last week as well.  We also discussed the Flight or Fight response as a refresher from previous lessons.  The 8th grade students then took a self-reflection survey (developed by Mental Health America of Northern Kentucky and Southwest Ohio, adapted from the Holmes-Rahe Life Stress Inventory for adults) in which they consider which life events have occurred in their lives over the last year.  These events lead them to a total stress score and a description about what that means.  Once students had their score, we talked about how stress is relative.  A student may have a high score, but not feel very stressed.  Or a student may have a low score and still feel a raised level of concern.  Students were asked to self-reflect and consider their current stress levels.  If they were concerned about stress in their life, they were encouraged to reach out to an adult.  I did not collect the surveys from the students, so you might ask your 8th grader about how they responded and what they think of their results.  

Yesterday I was able to co-present with Upper School Counselor, Kathy Lamb at a Parents Association meeting regarding resilience in teens.  In this presentation we talked about how we can help our students overcome obstacles in life, avoid or change perfectionist tendencies and decrease feelings of anxiety or helplessness.  To see our power point, click this link: Resilience in Teens.  You might also want to see these handouts: Handouts.  I am also available to talk with you anytime about questions or concerns you might have regarding your teen's ability to be resilient.  

At the end of last week we let off some steam in Advisory by holding Lip Sync Battles!  The kids did a great job and we had tons of fun and laughs!  It was a wonderful way to wrap up our semester.  Mrs. Culp and Senora Araiza's advisories received perfect 10 scores from the judges.  And Emery/Stockman advisories were crowned the overall 2nd quarter winners!  They will celebrate with a complimentary pizza party on Monday!  

And finally, I've had my pal, a chocolate lab named Chesney, here with me today at school.  He's been cheering up students and calming nerves all day with his cuddles and wagging tail!  He might make another appearance as we approach spring exams!

ThanksGIVING and Gratitude

This upcoming weekend is my favorite weekend of the year; I am able to spend quality time with my family and immerse myself in the holiday season!  (I may or may not be found humming holiday tunes, shopping with the crowds and eating too many sweets the next few weeks...) But each year, I do pause to think about how my own children are doing with the concepts of giving to others and gratitude - and what I can do to further their understanding of these important values.

Odd as it may seem, when Josh Ochs was here talking to our students - and to some parents - I began to reflect on giving and gratitude.  One of the ways Mr. Ochs encourages young adults to use social media is to highlight their community service and efforts to help others as sort of a self-marketing strategy.  He points out, however, that whatever post one might make, the focus should not be on oneself, but rather on the organization and/or people served and must always include a "thank you" to those who made it possible.  There is it, giving and gratitude in a social media conversation.  (Side note: there should be a video of Josh Och's parent presentation available soon)

Additionally I have been reading Josh's book, Light, Bright and Polite, and when he focuses on this aspect of positive social media use, he also stresses being genuine.  This is where it gets real for me.  Most anyone can schedule volunteer work, show up, complete the tasks and check it off a list.  How do I get my own children - and my students - to be genuinely invested in others, sincerely grateful for what they have and inspired to continue to give of themselves?

First, I know I have to model giving and gratitude.  I have to get out there and give to others.  Simple acts like courteous driving, paying for someone's lunch and helping another person through a doorway, or more involved work, such as donating goods, giving my time at a local charity and taking dinner to a sick friend.  I will also need to talk to my kids about what I am grateful for - from nice weather, to bedtime snuggles, to our warm home, and full refrigerator.  With my students I can comment on how nice it is to have a bookstore on campus, caring people making us warm meals each day and our own community in advisory.  I also know, I will need to persist in these endeavors.  It won't work for me to focus on this for a week or two and then slide back into the old routine.

Gratitude can be taught when we find the good in tough situations.  I know this is an area I could use some growth!    When my son struggles to read a challenging word, I can celebrate his determination and effort.  When my daughter has to wait in a long line with me, I can point out that we can do something fun to pass the time, such as play "I Spy."  When a student complains about course work being difficult, I can balance an empathetic response with one that points out the ways in which the student is rising to the challenge.

These ideas and more are included in a great, brief article I've included here if you'd like to do more reading on this topic: 9 Ways to Foster Gratitude in Teenagers.

I believe we are at an advantage at Pembroke Hill.  Our families value generosity and gratitude and it is very clearly woven into the fabric of our school.  Just in the last week I am aware of two student groups volunteering at Children's Place with young children and on our Lower School campus, hundreds of lunches were packed for Harvesters to give to kids around our city.  I'm almost certain other amazing things have happened within our PHS community that have positively impacted others.  I am even more certain that the students participating in these events were proud of their efforts and felt the joy that only giving to others can give us.  I'll leave you with some photos of one additional service event that occurred in the middle school last Monday.  Several students, and Dr. Leonard, worked hard to decorate boxes that will be filled with treats and sent to our service men and women who are serving our country during this holiday season.  Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family!

Harassment, Labels and Rumors - Oh My!

This past week both the 6th and 8th grade students have met for Wellness lessons.  7th graders met with the counselor during their Advisory rotation.  Here's a quick look into what we did together.

6th grade
The 6th graders are nearing the end of their 6 week series regarding bullying and social relationships.  The boys worked together to create videos about the impact of labels and stereotypes.  We will present the videos to each other on Monday and use them as a spring board for further conversation.  Ask your child: How are stereotypes a part of your school day?  How are you careful not to put hurtful or harmful labels on others?  For further reading: Tips for Battling Stereotypes

The 6th grade girls spent their lesson focused on gossip.  We used glitter to get our point across.  The girls were asked to pass glitter from their hands to the hands of the person next to them - they were told to get all the glitter off of their hands, but not to let any fall on the floor or tables.  Then they described the glitter - "shiny, fun, messy, sticky, little, colorful, seemed fun until I couldn't get it off me."  Earlier in the lesson we had worked to define gossip, so at this point the girls were asked how glitter is like gossip.  They said "It gets everywhere, you lose control of it, it looks fun but it gets messy, it sticks to you."  So we talked about how to respond to gossip.  One of the most common things I see is that kids think their friend has a right to know when other people are talking about them, but almost always that makes the situation worse.  So instead, the girls were encouraged to respond by saying "Don't tell me, I don't want to know, I don't want to be involved."  Additionally, they were encouraged not to spread the rumor, or not to spend time talking to multiple people trying to figure out where it started as that just gives more life to the rumor.  This is difficult for kids - they want to know who started it, yet the success rate of this sort of investigation is extremely low.  (Not too many kids are willing to admit they started a rumor!)  Talk about it at home: Use this link: Have You Ever Had a Rumor Spread About You? to read real life scenarios and talk them through.  What would you do?  Why do people spread rumors like this?  Have you ever heard a similar rumor about someone?

8th Grade
Our 8th graders spent their lesson talking about sexual harassment with a speaker from MOCSA.  Students shared that they have seen physical, verbal, written and non-verbal harassment at school by responding as to whether or not they had seen the examples the presenter shared.  Students learned that sexual harassment is UNWANTED sexual behavior and that the person receiving the behavior decides whether or not it is unwanted.   They left with a handout that looked like this:

The handout describes the different types of sexual harassment and details why sexting is actual illegal for minors.  On the back the handout outlines what to do if you are being harassed.  Ask your child: How would you respond if someone was harassing you?  Who would you tell?  Do you think harassment is a big deal?  Why or why not?

7th Grade

As mentioned above, I briefly saw the 7th grade students on Thursday of this week during our bi-weekly advisory rotation.  During this time I shared with the students that MOCSA had come to see our 8th graders and I thought they should hear the same information that our 8th graders did.  Together we read our school harassment policy and dissected the definition of harassment.  It was emphasized to students that the person any comment, action, or behavior is directed toward gets to decide if it is unwanted.  Additionally, that the person receiving the interaction has a responsibility to make it clear when something is unwanted.  We discussed why we think harassment is important to understand and what to do if you are being harassed.  This session was not interactive, so further discussion at home could be very helpful.  To talk about at home: Why do you think it's important for schools to have a harassment policy?  How should schools respond to harassment?  Have you seen harassment happening at school?  How would you respond if you were being harassed?

And lastly - a reminder for you that on Thursday November 19 in the evening, Josh Ochs will be talking with parents about all things social media as it relates to teenagers.  He will then speak with our students on Friday morning.  This event is hosted by our Parents Association.  Many thanks to all those who worked to put together this great event!